Walk Like a Democrat

Earlier this week, MSNBC Senior Campaign Correspondent Tucker Carlson told talk show host Rachel Maddow: “If at this point in the election you think there is still a possibility that Barak Obama can lose, you are… a Democrat.”

OK, I’m a Democrat. I carefully avoid making statements like, “when Obama wins,” opting for the more superstitious, “If Obama wins.” Hey… I don’t wanna jinx our guy in the last minutes of the campaign.

Carlson’s statement was meant as a jibe that Democrats are inherently pessimistic. But, as Maddow pointed out in our defense, we have good reason to fear that Republicans can still hijack the election. They have done it twice before, once when they lost the popular vote and robbed Democrats outright with a Supreme Court decision touted as a way to “save” our democracy from a divisive controversy, and again when they stole just enough votes in Florida and Ohio to eke out a victory. (Yes, they did. Shut up.)

Our paranoia that Republicans might swiftboat us into silent, unjust defeat is one of the reasons, I believe, that in this election Democrats are matching Republicans with vitriol for vitriol, slur for slur, slam for slam. It’s as if we collectively cannot afford the luxury of fairly considering both sides of the issues, or remaining moderate in the expression of our views. HELL no! Not this time! And our willingness, even eagerness, to fight back has confused Republicans, who released their pit bull expecting it to devour a poodle, and were demoralized when it found a rottweiler, a skunk and a porcupine guarding the campaign gates. Grrrrrrrrr.

But Democrats will be Democrats. Writing in Wednesday’s Huffington Post, political analyst Lincoln Mitchell wrote of a potential Obama victory:

“This should suggest to the operatives of the right wing that their cynical understanding of America can be trumped by a more affirming and progressive sentiment in the electorate.

“It is, however, the American left which will have to do the most intriguing and challenging rethinking of basic assumptions when Obama wins. For years now a central piece of the progressive worldview is that progressives are enlightened Americans in a sea of their ignorant, bigoted and narrow-minded compatriots… Opposition to progressive causes is often explained away by saying that Americans are bigots, or somehow stupid. This demonstrates an ugly contempt for voters, and in fact for democracy, that should have no place in progressive politics.”

Damn… do we have to start being good again already? Can’t we act like Republicans just a little longer, and gloat when, no, I mean if, Obama wins?

That depends. Once America is safely beyond the grasp of those who would violate its constitution, base a pre-emptive war on a pack of lies, break the law with impunity and thumb their noses at all who attempt to reign in these excesses, we should be able to relax and let our newly-elected Democrats repair the damage of the past eight years, right?

Yeah… and we should all be able to eat our weight in cake and still fit into our high-school-size jeans, too, but that won’t happen. In or out of office, powerful interests from the Right will continue to seek control of whatever they can get their hands on, including what’s left of our money. So we may be able to take a short break to brush the confetti out of our hair, and replace all the houseplants that died while we were volunteering for Moveon, but sooner or later, if we want to make use of the opportunity to advance progressive views, we will have to get back to work. We will have to remain informed about the issues, and volunteer our time and money to support the causes in which we believe, and yes, if rightwing conspirators slime our leaders, we will have to slime them back. Spreading the wealth is nice work, but only if you actually do it.

Meanwhile, if you notice people in the checkout line or at the gas pump or on their way to work, and they are peppered with bruises, they will be Democrats… because most of us are pinching ourselves to see if we are only dreaming that we might, maybe, possibly, probably will win this election.